This is probably the best known and most quoted verse in the Bible. As Christians, it defines us, gives us our hope, our joy, our strength, and our faith. This one verse describes everything we need to know to be saved. Forget everything else. It’s just noise blocking us from our truth. We are eternally loved and heaven bound! But wait a second.

“Jesus said to him, ‘I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.’”
— John 14:6 (NIV)

Well, that changes things a bit. Because Jesus also said:

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.”
— John 13:34 (NIV)

So the short version seems to be this: Jesus, in His own words, COMMANDED us to have the same love for each other as He has for us. Wow! And we can’t ask the Father for any reprieve or exception. Hmmm. We simply have no choice. We can’t avoid this commandment. But we have people in our lives that we (without hating) loath, abhor, despise, avoid, ignore, block out, gossip about, air THEIR dirty laundry! We refuse to acknowledge them in any way. Their past actions have dictated that we will NEVER forgive, forget, absolve, or tolerate them again. Now I understand that there are people we are protecting ourselves and our family from — those who might physically harm us. But everyone else? Those we don’t like or disagree with. They are just obnoxious, rude, selfish, self-centered, profane, hateful, politically incorrect... and the list is seemingly endless. We become relentless in our efforts to keep them out of our lives. This is acceptable, right?

But again, Jesus spoke.

“But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust.”
— Matthew 5:44-45 (NIV)

“But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.”
— Luke 6:27-28

But how? How do I love the person who just stole the most important thing in my life from me? What about the one who gossips about me, or the one who tells lies? There is no end to the offense we have been the target of. The most harmful have likely been from family members. The crazy Aunt that constantly berates me and despises me. The cousin who laughs at me because she thinks she’s better than me. Or worse, the step-parent who makes communication with my parent almost impossible, or mocks me or my faith. Tell me how I’m supposed to get past all the trauma, the memories, the pain? These people are hopeless, unrepentant, and unredeemable. Tell me that!

And He does. Without a word. Tears flowing as I type. Because He forgives me. His love for me is unequivocal. For every single thing I have ever done, said, felt, acted on, intentionally or accidentally. Whether I was remorseful, indifferent, or uncaring. Every single thing, for my entire life and for mistakes I haven’t even made yet, He has loved me, forgiven me. ME! Regardless of the offense. I am forgiven! I AM LOVED!

It has taken me many years to be able to recognize all of this. My inability to put these words together in my head and recognize His truth is unbelievable. But finally, He put this understanding in my heart. It didn’t happen in an instant, but it happened. I first felt Him moving in my relationship with Him — spending more time in the Bible and in quiet, peaceful prayers. It’s amazing how that works. When you make time for Him, He’s always there waiting for you. I started to see how much He has done for me. Even as unworthy as I am, He has never forgotten me or abandoned me. I am so grateful for His presence, His relentless pursuit of my heart, His grace, and patience. Looking back at my life, I see the many times He was there, but I took the credit. How many times He provided for me, but I considered it the result of my actions, of just good luck. I am so blessed by His kindness that now I cannot speak of His mercy in my life without tears of joy and gratitude. I hope a day comes when I can give my testimony to others without so many tears, but now I realize that is not a decision for me to make — it’s determined by His plan for me.

I now have a different view of people in my life. A view He is providing for me. I work very hard to see others as He has seen me. To love as He has loved me and to be merciful as He has shown me mercy. I have a very long way to go. I am constantly reminded that I am not perfect and not as loving as I should be, but I am learning. He is the teacher!

Let's grab a coffee. The Shepherd is speaking.

The Bible is God’s gift to us. A book of life. An instruction manual. A communication tool. Literally every single life event has a purpose and this is His direction on how to live it. It may not seem like the Bible can solve your every problem, or give you every answer, but in a way, it can.

You see it starts with how we got here. I mean, what was He thinking? Why did He create this? Why did He create us? It explains why life is so hard. Why there is sin in our world. Why He gave us rules to follow. How He is truly our Father, correcting and redirecting us generation after generation. He gave our ancestors gifts of wisdom and guided them time and time again. He made sure all of this was documented, and made available to us year after year, from generation to generation. And when we still couldn’t keep ourselves on track, He sent us His Son. His own flesh and blood! He walked among us so that we could have eternal salvation and an abundant life. It is documented and passed on to us. The gift that has never stopped giving!

The question is what do we do with this gift? Do we live it with our own interests and intentions, seeking our path and our desires, our own self-gratification, or do we listen to His voice as it leaps off the pages of this gift?

I have tried both. I have tested the waters of the “easy” path. Immorality will not produce anything remotely resembling lasting joy, happiness, success or peace. It will always bring darkness, despair, pain and a feeling of exile. And we can’t say we weren’t warned.

Hebrews 12:25 - "See that you do not refuse him who is speaking. For if they did not escape when they refused him who warned them on earth, much less will we escape if we reject him who warns from heaven."

He said it, we heard it, it is written and handed down generation to generation. He has made sure that we know. You just heard it again. Don’t let this opportunity pass. Pick it up! Read a verse. Open your eyes and you will see, open your heart to feel His presence. Nothing can compare with it!

Let's grab a coffee. The Shepherd is speaking.

Grandson sick at school, doctor appointment because you can’t miss school without it. Parents are teachers and don’t need to desert their students, grandmother is also ill. Another grandson needs a ride to and from an event, a granddaughter’s soccer practice, another one needing her grandparents as her parents were in need of alone time to work on some kind of resolution to a difficult season in their lives. A trip to our local Sam’s Club was like a vacation by the end of the day! Coffee! I needed coffee. Both in the traditional sense of a few minutes to relax, clear the head from all the noise, rest the body from the activity and just relax. But even more I needed spiritual filling. Love in motion still empties the tank. I needed Him.

I know we all go through this. We leave church on Sunday, full of His love and grace. Raring to go and defeat whatever demons dare to attack us. But Monday comes and that level of encouragement we felt is already waning. And so it goes through the rest of the week. We need to find Him and get refilled. My morning routine is a cup of decaf, a time of prayer, and a few minutes of just listening. Eagerly, but from a place of quiet, solemn humility, and a few simple requests like, which direction should I go today, who would you have me serve today, or who should I reach out to today. Other days I ask for His words as I already know His plan for me for that day. He put someone on my heart and He is going to use me to speak to them. If there is anyone reading this that doesn’t believe that this happens, I assure you it does. I am asked by others when sharing these stories later what exactly the message was and many times I confess I have no idea. I have returned to some of these and asked the other person if they recalled exactly what we talked about or what part of it actually made some difference in their lives, and their response is usually, “I don’t remember but it was obviously what I needed to hear”. Some even tell me they were in a bad place and our conversation was just enough for them to realize that they were not in control. Others have been able to summarize even after a lengthy amount of time and having gone through extreme life events.

One example that happened several years ago was a man I barely knew stopped by my desk after closing time and began a conversation. While I wasn’t the transformed man I am today, I could feel God moving me to speak. At the time, I had never experienced a situation where He was leading me to share something like my faith with someone else. The conversation lasted for a while, and when it was over, I knew what it meant to give testimony. I had no idea what words I spoke but I assure you they weren’t mine. I immediately called my wife to tell her about the experience and she of course asked for specifics that I couldn’t provide. This individual later experienced something most of us never will. A near death experience. He was struck by lightning. It wasn’t the kind of experience you read about, no following the light, no looking down as people tried to save him, nothing of the kind. He just knew he survived. Having spent many months in ICU, it had been a very long time between our initial conversation and the one we had after he returned to work. When I approached him, I said “Hey man! You’re not supposed to be here!” He chuckled and said “I know, right!” He continued, thanking me for our conversation, and told me that when alone in ICU for months, a man has a lot of time for reflection. That he examined his life, his beliefs and his decisions. He told me the one thing he kept returning to during those months, was our conversation. He said he had vivid memory of stories, events in my life I had shared with him, and how they influenced my beliefs. He said he compared my stories to events in his life and how, in similar situations, he made different decisions, chose different paths. He told me that he now looked at life through a different lens.

I asked if he now believed in Jesus or had given his life to Him, and unfortunately, he said no. He did however say that he knew that there must be a higher power, because this world, his life and experiences, couldn’t all simply be by chance. I have prayed for him, and my hope is that someday I will learn of his salvation.

Now back to work. But this time I have been waiting on HIS direction. The early results are amazing. I am never shocked at how great our God is. I won’t bore you with details as this project is a journey requiring much more effort, more detail and more patience than I would have expected. However He is beside me. It is after all, a He AND I project. So in HIS time.

Let’s grab a coffee. The Shepherd is speaking.

Last night was the pinnacle. Topic after topic. Prayer after prayer. By 4:00 am I can no longer sleep. I’m sitting in the dark with my phone writing down everything I can remember. Just little thoughts of some things I need to pursue. Verses that I know but don’t yet know why He reminded me of them. Others I can’t place but now have a renewed meaning. Observations about society I see differently now. And the one I can’t get away from today, the normalization of the attacking of our savior, Jesus.

It’s becoming so common place that many times now, I have it thrust upon me by surprise because I heard nothing about it in the media. Hopefully it was the story of the week and I just missed it and not that we Christians are just giving up.

Last night, my wife and I watched a movie that was released months ago We had seen the first installment and found it entertaining a few years back. I wondered why I hadn’t heard much fanfare about the sequel. It was dreadful compared to the first. I felt disappointed at best and at worst, angry that I had allowed myself to see it. In The Devil Wears Prada 2, the sacrilegious scene about the Last Supper was appalling. If you haven’t seen it yet, DONT! Let me spare you some sanity. There is a scene where the main characters are looking at Leonardo da Vinci’s The Last Supper. She then states that in this particular painting, that de Vinci did not paint a halo around the ‘central character’s head’ because the artist wanted to present that he was a man and therefore fallible! How disrespectful. The central character? Maybe this called me to pray. Not at first but while literally sleeping on it.

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.” - John‬ ‭13‬:‭34‬‬.

Why is this so hard. Someone actually wrote the lines. Someone else spoke them. Someone filmed them. Someone else edited it. I can go on and on. Every single person involved in delivering this to the masses is complicit. Yet we are commanded to love them. Ok. Calm now.

First of all, for the record, it is widely accepted that Da Vinci didn’t omit the halo to say Jesus was a sinner or a failure. Instead, he wanted to emphasize the genuine human drama and emotion of the apostles’ betrayal. But what is the most concerning is the normalization of what to me seems like an attack on Christianity.

Am I alone in this? If I’m going off the deep end please tell me. My faith is in Him! Let me know your thoughts!

Leave a comment

Let’s grab a coffee. The Shepherd is speaking.

I have remembered that conversation over the years and we have had many conversations since where the family member now agrees. That transformation is something worthy of its own post, but not the subject matter today.

For quick reference, this is about the Pharisees trying to trap Jesus by asking him was it OK to heal someone on the Sabbath, followed by the teaching on humility at the table (in an honored seat or stuck in the back row).

Essentially the message from the pastor was on humility and quietly serving others.

The sermon was great, but I couldn’t help but feel God pointing a finger at me (as I usually do)! All I heard was a message of conviction. I just spent yesterday concerned about not being seen here. Don’t misunderstand, I am here for the right reasons and wish this could happen without my name or accolades. I spent a lot of time looking for a way to keep my name off this project, but Substack has at least made it hard. But my concern about being seen was based on ‘how can I serve’ without someone to serve? I have very little doubt that there are people in this world with the same needs as me, both before and after God transformed me. I know several, and am related to a few. I have had conversations with them and know when we are ready, they will be here. But I think if I was reading my posts and found that every comment or subscription was a member of my family, I would lose hope that this was something for me. Then there are the rules. They take the fun out of everything, don’t they? Unfortunately the enemy immediately began using these against me. “Lots of views but no subscriptions eh? Nobody cares!” Now I understand that most here are likely skeptical that once you subscribe, your inbox will be under attack. And there are a lot of people that may view a post and feel this is no benefit to them. But unfortunately, anytime I connect to work on my next post or planning the next step, there are these nasty things called stats that are suddenly all I can see. And I let the enemy win. I literally asked AI if my stats were normal.

After being convicted this morning for the desire to be seen, He wasn’t through with me. He then re-convicted me by pointing out that that same desire had me wanting to be at the head of the table. Well that is an overstatement but a conviction none the less.

Then came the best part. Our desire should be to serve those in need. Not the known but the unknown. Not the prominent but the unseen. Not the noisiest but the quiet. Those with no where else to turn.

I have a friend, who I am sure will join me here at some point, who has endured hardship in his life that would have resulted in many like me throwing in the towel. I don’t think I would have survived. In his youth, self satisfaction turned to addiction, and we know where that leads. At one point, he lost his wife and other friends in the same incident. He was suddenly alone except for his mom and infant son. The burdens of life and addiction became too much. His mom stepped in for his son, but he went off the deep end. After 2 convictions and jail time, He found Christ. I know a lot of good people in this world, but this man has ranked number one for me in who on this planet would I entrust my life to. I began to feel this way about him after only knowing him for a few months. Having only met him about 11 years ago, and not spending a lot of time with him after the first year or so, I have to explain that the reason for the admiration for this man is the immediate and total change in him. It wasn’t just a whim, it was complete and permanent.

Having coffee a few months ago, the only face to face time I have spent with him in years, we had a discussion about his faith. I was appalled to hear how little he knew about Jesus, yet how strong his faith remained. He wasn’t attending church, rarely read scripture, but was confident in his love for Jesus. He is saved. The discussion obviously turned to John 10:10 and the abundant life. I have no doubt that the first thing he did when he got home that night was open his bible. I hope one day he is here to tell his story. It is an amazing, real world experience that would help many people. Especially those who have been where he has been. Since the day of his transformation, he has been and still is an every day AA participant and sponsor. It is his ministry he told me.

I have also had similar conversations with many family members. I recently discovered that of my four sisters, one close to me in age essentially had the same working knowledge of the bible and our faith, however one of my younger sisters, raised in the same house, same parents, same church and pastor, could have taught each other a few of the most basic things like does God speak to us, or are we called to share the Gospel. I have been astounded. It has almost been like we never attended church in our lives and believed in what we stumbled across on social media!

So I KNOW there are people who can benefit from the loving, safe support of a small group. Yet I let the enemy question that knowledge. How amazing is our God. Right on cue, I abide by showing up to get filled up for the week ahead and he slaps me with the cold hard truth. This isn’t about me. I need to be more faithful. He is directing this process, not me. Praise him!

Let’s grab a coffee. The Shepherd is speaking.

My first 4 posts lead me (finally) here. Why am I here and what is the plan that He has laid out for me.

First of all, my journey here was led by Him. It started with my son’s invitation, which He used to pry open my self-righteous heart. It was followed by prayers daily to help me heal the things in my heart that were my attempt at avoiding any conversation with him. Next came my decision to abide, even when it wasn’t comfortable. I will post about this process soon and add a link here to explain, however I now believe that He was preparing me to accept this request, to allow Him to use me to provide a channel of love and fellowship to those that have need of a safe, accepting and loving group to share with and be shared with. The way He uses this form of service to each other is nothing short of amazing. So amazing, it is the only thought in my head when attempting to name this domain. I should have asked Him for help, but again, I’m still learning. He took care of it by putting a name in my head, which I was astounded to find that it was available, and even provided a second available name for future use if necessary.

My initial direction was unequivocal. Do this. Build a way for this to happen. After that, when the questions of how to do this and that, the direction has been a little softer. My concerns have been obvious questions like men and women together, or separate groups? How to decide what emails to send? I don’t want to fill up inboxes! How will we decide on groups, what will that look like? I haven’t heard direction to do it this way or that. My answers, more like hints have been like, He will direct His people, you just get them to the table.

So that is how the design will be. Build the methods to get those interested to the table. Ask for your preferences. Build around the answers. The logistics of functionality are irrelevant until the basic technology is in place and a few sign up. Then they can help with decisions. My job here is to serve.

So now is the time to ask. I need to know if any here is interested in helping me. I will not be able to actively participate in every group. I am likely not even close to being as qualified as a lot of people here to even lead a group. I do have experience being involved and have insight on what makes this work. It isn’t a Pastor and his flock environment. It is a group of people that have genuine problems in their lives that their faith alone can’t provide. But every group will need a facilitator, at least at first. Someone who may do nothing but break the ice. We weren’t designed to handle everything on our own. The design is to love one another, help one another, serve one another. Jesus walked with us to show us by example how to do this. He didn’t pick experts to help him and learn from him. We shouldn’t need to either. We cannot heal the broken, only provide the support, and share the gospel where directed.

If you feel you could benefit from becoming involved in this process, please subscribe. I will only send an email when I have prepared a few questions that will help me direct my plans. I will ask first, what can I do to serve you. Do you feel called to assist in development of the process, or maybe a group facilitator. But most importantly, how can I pray for you or help you become involved in a group.

Let me serve you.

Let’s grab a coffee. The Shepherd is speaking.

This is Part 5 of a 5-part series. [Start from the beginning →]

I began this morning, reading from Isaiah. I am getting distracted and I hear words not in the chapter I am reading. When this happens to me, I usually just stop, pray TO Him, asking that he clear my head, provide me the focus I need to ensure I am receiving whatever He is going to give me today. But what I got FROM him was an answer to questions I hadn’t asked. Why me, why this project, why now?

The words I heard were “You aren’t going to save the Kingdom or anyone in it.”

I asked for more. What do I do with this. I am following something you put on my heart to do. I’m abiding in what I think you are leading me to do. How do I use this for your glory? The words kept me thinking. I can’t save anyone, only He can. I know that already. I can only serve. Next came this sentence — Ours is not to save the Kingdom, but to serve it. This isn’t the way I normally speak. I must have read that somewhere. Sounds like John F. Kennedy to me! “Ask not what your country can do for you...” But it wouldn’t go away. So I prayed for discernment. I felt and heard nothing. I googled it. Nothing close. Maybe this is His way of giving me direction for this project. Something about what this should be.

I have briefly mentioned this project to family members and close friends. Most of them have been like ho hum, ok, so what? The only feedback I have received is how are you going to be able to acquire facilitators to start these groups and ensure they have the tools to make this beneficial to the participants. I have had several ideas on how this could work, but these questions have now sown doubt. This entire project began with him putting this on my heart 3 days ago! I had already come to terms with the obvious questions, how much time, how much cost, available technology, etc. But now the personal experience questions. I can create the method for people to engage, the environment to make them safe, and the capability to allow person to person contact. But how do we get them started. How do we get them invested in a relationship with Christ? We don’t. We make suggestions, answer questions, provide guidance. In short, He saves, we serve. Nothing more. Ours is not to save the Kingdom, but to serve it.

In the months that God has spent transforming me, He has consistently pushed me in a direction of service. At first I had this desire to stand on a mountaintop or a street corner and shout out to everyone, about the newest version of me that He was transforming. Let everyone understand why Jesus came, in His own words. John 10:10 - NIV - “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” I quickly realized that this wasn’t His plan. It was my plan. Proverbs 19:21 - “Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.”

So what did he have in store for me? What should I do with all of this exuberance for the Lord?

Let’s grab a coffee. The Shepherd is speaking.

This is Part 4 of a 5-part series. [Start from the beginning →] | [Continue to Part 5 →]

After reading Wild at Heart, I began to feel something stirring in me. I wanted to believe it was the Holy Spirit leading me but I’ve never paid attention to these kind of feelings before. Meeting with the guys for coffee, I began to understand that what I was feeling was not unique. In fact it was expected. Seems everyone at the table had been in my spot before.

God was working in me. Just as before, there was a little crack and He filled it. He used the opportunity to let me realize there was more for me here. Something I needed to pursue. I began to talk at coffee a little more, share what I was experiencing. The guys understood. They had travelled a similar road and some explained their own recent growth. Almost immediately I wanted more. More knowledge about our Lord, more time at coffee, and a renewed desire to read scripture.

I have been a Christian my entire life. Many times boasting about how I had read the entire Bible cover to cover. Twice. So proud! But spending my time with this group of men blew me away. I asked. Not a one of them could boast as I could. But they knew things. I mean they KNEW things. They would explain to me that God spoke to them all, in many different ways. We talked about the things they did daily, almost without fail. Read scripture. Hear what they read. Pray persistently. And the real killer for me at the time, spend time talking and praying from a posture of quiet surrender.

Now whenever I read scripture, pray, or just ramble through my thoughts while praying, I start with a few quiet minutes, alone, to empty my head of all the chaos in this life. I literally deeply exhale and consciously attempt to open my heart to Him.

Now what does this mean? We all have a physical heart. It is nearly centrally located in the upper chest. When we experience something extremely painful, like the loss of a loved one, there’s this place in a chest that immediately feels empty, pained, for some making it difficult to breathe. For anyone who had a substance addiction, mine was nicotine, the emptiness felt by withdrawal also feels this way. It is an emptiness only He can fill. It is at the times when we are most likely to turn to Him. This place is where I focus. I want to open this place of pain.

I quickly learned that while all this advice was good, it simply wasn’t working for me. I was advised to do some more reading. I chose 2 additional titles from John Eldredge. The first, Walking With God, gave me great insight into areas that may be impeding my ability to hear God. Then Waking The Dead. A little more intense, especially concerning spiritual warfare.

By now I just couldn’t get enough, fast enough. I wanted to spend every waking moment involved in this process. I became overwhelmed, frustrated, like I was failing. I realized that when I first started with the small group, things were great, but like I always do, I begin to make it my plan, not His.

It was time to slow down, pause, return to what was from Him, not from me or any books I could read. Time for me to rest in Him.

Let’s grab a coffee. The Shepherd is speaking.

This is Part 3 of a 5-part series. [Start from the beginning →] | [Continue to Part 4 →]

My son, for HIS birthday last year, gave ME, his brother, and his brother-in-law a gift.

It was a copy of Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man’s Soul by John Eldredge. Inside the front cover, he wrote an inscription that pierced straight through to my heart. It read:

Dad,

This book has been a display of God’s goodness & love. He used the words of this book to change my life. It has reshaped my understanding of who I am and in doing so he has changed the way I view my wife, son and daughters.

My hope in gifting you this book is not only that you might read it but that it might help reveal who God designed you to be in ways that impact your life & family but mostly your heart.

In love,
Michael

I pray that together we, as men, can impact each other’s hearts & the hearts of our wives & children so that they love the Lord & the world like Christ does.

A few months later my son sent me a text message inviting me to get a cup of coffee with a small group he had started with a friend from church and a couple of others. While I was apprehensive, I accepted. I prayed before entering the coffee shop that I could keep my foot out of my mouth and not embarrass myself or worse, my son. The men in this small group had recently participated in a custom course inspired by the very concepts in Wild at Heart being developed by their men’s pastor.

These young men were realizing that a performance-based, rule-following Christian life wasn’t enough. They were pursuing something I had been completely oblivious to for my entire life - an actual conversational intimacy with a loving Father.

The only way to truly know someone is to be with them and talk with them. I had spent decades talking to God through one-way prayer requests, but I had never learned to sit in quiet surrender and let the Shepherd speak back to me.

Safe Spaces for Hearts

Sitting in that small coffee group with my son didn’t just change my personal relationship with God, it changed my relationship with my son and planted the seed for what Coffee Disciples will eventually become.

True discipleship doesn’t happen in a giant stadium or a classroom. It happens when a few individuals gather together in a safe, transparent environment to share their stories of faith and failure without fear of judgment.

That is our long-term goal here. We want to facilitate the formation of online discipleship groups where people can connect—anonymously at first to ensure safety and vulnerability—to encourage and disciple each other using godly principles.

My son prayed that together we, as men, could impact each other’s hearts. The journey starts by learning to listen to the One who created those hearts.

Let’s grab a coffee. The Shepherd is speaking.

This is Part 2 of a 5-part series. [Start from the beginning →] | [Continue to Part 3 →]

The reason for this journey:

Threefold concept I was oblivious to:
The heart is central to the Christian life. We are invited into a conversational intimacy with God. Spiritual warfare is real.

Scriptural basis for this journey:
John 10. 1-18
We are the sheep following our shepherd. He knows us by name - we follow him because we know his voice. Our shepherd protects us from the enemy. By following our shepherd’s voice, we will have life.

And He said:”Have it to the full”!
The abundant life. Full of love, happiness, and joy, in the land of milk and honey. And this abundant/eternal life doesn’t begin at death. IT STARTS NOW.

Can it be possible that we can really have this kind of relationship with God?

My entire life, my belief system has been that believing, attending church, following the rules, being a person of repentance, and doing a few good deeds will get me to heaven. This is God’s plan for me. But is that all there is?

Our deepest desires and most pressing needs are only truly filled by learning how to have an intimate conversational relationship with the kindest, wisest, most generous and loving father there has ever been or ever will be. Our walk with God is the process of developing the relationship between us and our Father, our source for everything we need, and our only hope. Intimacy with God is THE PURPOSE of our lives. It is the only thing that can fulfill us, giving true meaning to our lives.

Looking backward, I fear I might have been on the road to perdition. Not as if I was not heaven bound but instead like I was waisting or failing at this gift of life He designed for me. But for the Lord! He used my “knowledge” against me. Forced me into situations where I had to choose a path. An how sweet the Lord’s love for me, he made the wrong choice difficult and His path so easy. He slowly changed me into the person He made me to be. Someone who not only knew right from wrong, but became much better at recognizing and choosing His path. Yet I still turned away. It was I, who had become a better version of me, not an image of Him. I felt righteous, but it was self-righteousness. I felt superior to others, my self described moral character was something I could marvel at, but I realized I was still not fulfilled.

Then my Father, my Lord, my God, oh how I needed Him.

In a period of about a year, I went from being in the most ‘in control’ part of my life to facing the possible end of my professional life. How did this happen? But I was in control. I was the one who was doing all the right things.

My heart was in a state of pain, depression, anxiety, disappointment, and unbelief. I felt like I had been hit by a truck. I finally realized that I wasn’t in control. You know. That footprints in the sand moment. Where was He?

In my despair, I turned, I looked to Him, but I knew that I had been shunning Him by believing in me, my goodness, my strength, my knowledge. But for Him. In my brokenness, I pled. I begged. I made promises I didn’t know if I could keep. My answer came in minutes. I literally fell to my knees……completely overwhelmed, and seemingly unending tears. I don’t know if I had ever cried so hard in my life or since. I had opened my heart a little bit and He immediately filled it.

Let’s grab a coffee. The Shepherd is speaking.

This is Part 1 of a 5-part series. [Continue to Part 2 →]